Wednesday, 27 August 2014

DEAR MOBY


Helloooo Mobylizers... Its another day of the week where we get to help another fellow that has issues and need help. I think my alter ego looks and behaves like Oprah or Trisha...just saying o. I think someday, maybe someday I might just have a talk show and guess who would be my co-host? Guess no more....it would either be Yours truly (Obi) or Tibs or Tosin or Eden or Aby or Duru or .........if I continue ehn,the 'or' won't end...or maybe you. Yes you...you and Moby might just have a talk show *winks*.

So I got loads of pings on my bbm and one mail concerning our yesterday's post 'beautiful within and without'. It was just another random thought I put down and someone was touched. I'm proud of me. Y'all should give me a pat on the back...oya pat my back NOW *turns my back to you*. Thank you. So let's get right to it. This is a very fragile post so please let's treat it fragile-ly..... The way I just put down a word randomly ehn, God help our next generation with my english.

Dear Moby,

Good evening. Your post today inspired this letter as it felt like you were talking directly to me. I have a teenage son and I don't know if what he has is low self esteem or inferiority complex but he kind of acts like a girl. I don't know how I'll handle it if my son is gay but if he is, I guess I'll have to accept him like that but how do I tell him to be himself and tell him he's beautifully made as a man and not make it sound awkward?

It is a hard thing for a mother and a Christian to bear. I know as a Christian homosexuality is a taboo but I am his mother, I am meant to have my sons back every time. I am practically in tears now as I type. I watch my son walk like a girl, sneak into my room to play with my make-up items, prefer the company of girls, sit on the toilet to pee and just generally behave very girlish. He practically imitates his elder sister.

Moby, my boy is just 11 years old, his sister is 13 and you won’t believe he sits on the toilet to pee. I know and hope it’s still too early to conclude that he might be gay but I am very scared. My husband died when he was barely three. God rest his soul. So I don’t really know how to go about this issue. I don’t want my son to turn out gay, Moby he can’t. I’m praying he isn’t it’s against my religion and it would bring me shame.

Please help me; just tell me anything I can do. I need to stop it now if at all it’s there. I pray every day but I know I have to take practical actions. I secretly read your blog and I saw how you and other readers addressed the case of that boy that wanted to go into music so I just thought to share this here.

 Thank you very much; I like what you are doing. God will bless and lift you up. Amen .



MOBY SPEAKS: Hmmmmn.....this is one serious issue. First of all, accept my condolences as regards your husband. May God grant you the fortitude to bear the loss.

Homosexuality has become a major virus that has found its place in Nigeria (via whatever means....mostly media *rolls eyes*) and is fast eating into the lives of many. In fact, we now have groups, clubs and societies that promote this un-Godly act even in the open. God have mercy on us.

Your son would not turn out gay in Jesus Christ's name. However, like you have said, you have to back your faith with works. It’s enough to pray and have faith but you have to take strategic steps into ensuring your child doesn’t take the wrong path. I would give steps you can take to make sure your child’s sexual orientation remains intact. Please other mothers and intending mothers can take cue from the steps and if anyone has any addition, please do (i no fit sabi everything na...LOL).

Ok let’s do this:

1. Recognise that homosexuality is a spirit and a bad habit that is imbibed as a result of neglect of its early traits (so you are lucky you’ve noticed now)...Hence for other mothers and fathers, ensure you always pay attention to your kids. Notice their actions and behavioural patterns and take corrective actions when and where necessary.


2. Talk to your son FREQUENTLY. Ask questions about his day, what he did, where he went and try to identify the friends he moves with in school. Also involve his teachers in school to constantly monitor his movements and apply corrective measures when necessary.


3. Be firm. Put your feet down on certain issues like he using your make up, or sitting down while peeing. You might have to employ the use of canes and whips.


4. Talk to him about why he shouldn’t be like a girl. Give him certain masculine tasks and reward him. Have him enrolled into activities like: the boys scout, taekwondo, football, and other very masculine activities.


5. Let him constantly be around other male family members and neighbours.


6. This might sound funny, but you have to screen whatever he watches and occasionally let him catch a glimpse of movies with somewhat steamy scenes. Be careful to have this controlled and not too often so you don’t create a pervert. Also let him watch masculine action movies. This could stimulate some ‘man-ness’ in him.


7. Buy him masculine toys; guns, car, war & action figures


8. Buy him a masculine super hero costume and do a lot of role playing. Let him always kill the villain.


9. Monitor his online activities; his face book, twitter and sites he visits (he really shouldn’t be on any of these social platforms at his age) and sites he visits.


10. Tease him with one particular girl as his wife... That really helps... I hope he likes it sha but don't embarrass him with it.


Phew......! That took a lot of thinking. I decided to write exactly what I would do if I was in your shoes. I deliberately did not check any site, or google possible solutions because I wanted it to be as real as possible so everything I wrote came directly from my heart (with consultation from boo...*wink* ). I hope this helps and I pray all turns out well with you and your family. Please do all you can do to ensure you don’t lose your son to homosexuality. God would help us all.

My Mobylizers oya oooo.. What do you think? Is she just being paranoid? Let's help a grieving mother out. Thank you...

Cheers..

11 comments :

  1. MOby love, if it have happen it have happen. Na baba God fit intervene. My first sexual experince was with a lesbian. I was 8 to 9 yrs. I never knew anything was wrong. I never told my mum. When my mum goes out she gives me to this our neigbour to take care of oo. She did like 12times if I may try not to exergerate.
    Later in life I knew it was wrong but i had fantasis of sleeping with a girl. I even fantacised sleeping with a friend in boarding school and my younger sister. That's why I decided to sleep with my first boy friend at 18. Guess what? I tasted it and it was better and normal. So I got used to d**k cus that's suppose to be the normal thing. A key is meant to open a padlock. Not a padlock opening a padlock. Not a key opening a key. That's out of natural. And I said to myself that I am straight not gay. It was a determination to change.

    Madam, ask ur son if any man had pocked his ass or sucked his d**k. Cus must of the gay cases like mine was due to abuse. And pls don't send him to boarding school. I repeat don't send him to borden school. Homosexual activities thrive there.
    Watch the man u put him in company with. Like moby said watch his friends.
    Its a spirit. Ones a boy sleeps with a man at a young age there is a transfer of spirit and he starts having gay tendencies.

    And madam if u have not started having faith na today today u go start. Don't go and be crying to God. That's not faith. Speak words of faith. Like my son is straight, he is attracted to women, he will marry a woman. He is a child of God.
    Then speak to him. Tell him how much u love him. Show him love. Cane can't solve this instead it might make him depressed and want to commit suicide. Tell him he is a great man. Tell him he will marry a beautiful wife. Look for one Iya wo and tell him that its his wife (jokingly). Talk to him about sex. 11 is not to early. Don't tell him the explicit details sha.
    Love melts the heart more than cane.
    I am an ex lesbian so I've got experience. I know I am not perfectly holy but God loves me.
    Thank u 4 this opportunity moby love.

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  2. Wow Moby I am impressed with your answer. Madam its time you start taking serious actions, you can add whip too. And don't think of send him to a male relative some of them are abusers, you are his Mom and God will grant you grace to train him to become a man dat will be fond of women.

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  3. Hahaha....Miss BNG is here!!!!......lmaooo @Ex-lesbian.........I am just gonna say this......LET HIM BE......if he feels comfortable doing all you mentioned....LEAVE HIM BE......You are 'supposed' to be his mother....so Gay or not...your job as a GOOD mother is to 'love' him dearly....why do you feel/think you need to do something bout all this??......he has a big sister...chances are he admires her a lot......and he doesn't have a male figure right now in his life.....some kids...just take to whatever they have/see/is done in their environment.......honestly....until you see him kiss a boy or introduce a boy to you as his partner...you have NO right to steer up this pot...and frankly...I am disappointed....cuz you are supposed to be strong...I mean...you have occupied that vacuum of a dad in his life all this while and now you wanna play therapist???...Naaa......Be a GOOD mother and LOVE your son no matter what....I got lots of gay friends...beautiful lesbians and highly intelligent gay men..........it is a sin and blah blah blah.....is there a sin that outweighs the other???.........Lemme know when you have an answer to that.....**flicks hair and walks away**

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  4. wow you tried because i was a bit speechless after reading it, i didnt know what to think sighs! lime miss Bng wrote i would as a parent make him feel very comfortable and ask him some questions. i dont know alot of gay people but someone the ones out there (in the entertainment business) were molested and that how they got into it. you just never know it kinda of like tasting something you should have u tend to want to sample it over and over again.some people say it innate but i dont even know what to believe. but i would say pray and also make sure he is surrouned my male strong figures (scrutinize them well o plz) . try to be close to him and dont make him feel wierd.all he needs right now is love he may just be copying what he is surrounded by and the makeup part i would be very firm and let him know that is a no go area no compromising. but say it gently with love.

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  5. Moby you have said it all. I will not want my child to have girly qualities if he was a guy but puting myself in her position,I think I would do everything you stated.

    **Muna

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  6. How can sm1 say 'let him be'??except you are not a christian. Being gay is an abomination in the sight of God.It challenges Gods wisdom of making a man for a woman. So madam, do every thing to save his soul.as his mother, God put you incharge of him so you will have a case to answer b4 God if your child strays down the wrong path.

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  7. Ha Homo ke? God forbid.Madam go to surulere and hire 2 of those ashanas and let them nack your son well. Let dem f**k the gay outta him abeg

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  8. Moby, I think you've covered practically all the bases - well done!!! I 'd just like to emphasis that the young guy needs to relate with male figures who would mentor him, but please be careful in selecting the men for the job o. Be sure that they are people whose background and spiritual maturity is known to you o. Such a person should be aware of and sympathetic towards your son. Also try & engage the young guy in sports or other manly club activity in his school. At home, build his self esteem by making him understand that he is the man of the house and that you and his sister are looking up to him to take care of you, delegate some manly responsibilities to him and celebrate him.

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  9. Moby you have said it all. @Tibs, homosexualism is a sin.there is no sugar coating needed. Your child show gay abilitty, you take him to church sharp sharp.its a sin

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  10. I think you have done a good job with your advice. The most important thing is to pray for him.

    http://journalofapetitediva.blogspot.com

    P.S: I nominated you for the gratitude challenge (bloggers version), you are supposed to accept the challenge within 24 hours. For more info check out http://journalofapetitediva.blogspot.com/2014/08/the-gratitude-challenge.html

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  11. yes teasing him with a girl will help , i agree with you. Not easy being a mother but i pray God grant you wisdom
    fashionitazbybuiti.blogspot.com

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