Friday, 17 October 2014

MEN CAN LIE SHA


Story Story!...................................STORY!...

Once upon a time!......................Time Time...
In a village called Uzuh, in the great Ajah kingdom, there was a man ....this man can lie ehn?....he can lie for Olympics oooo...One day, the man lied and Nepa took light...even satan wonders who or what tempts and motivates the man to lie......................."see all of you really wanting to hear story" LOL......


Oya snap back to Mobylization.....*big grin*
Hello lovies. How are you? hope you enjoyed my story?....I'm sure you did..else, I'll tell another...LOL..

Have you ever felt like you're not good enough and all you want to do is give up? Like you just get really depressed and all you want to do is either cry or sleep? I need to do a check up mehn...been feeling like that of late and I need to work on it. I mean I love where I am but I feel like I'm getting old....and I've stopped having fun. I miss having fun. Asides work and blogging, there's nothing more to Moby. I am so boring. I told le boo yesterday (he is kinda my therapist) and he said and I quote 'Babes You are in the season of sowing....you are still planting and so when the season of harvesting comes, you would have so much fun'....*folds arms +rolls eyes + stamps feet on the ground...then huge sigh!*... I guess that worked for my mood yesterday cos after he spoke (the guy can sabi form inspirational talker), I felt so much better.

So let's get back to today's topic before I bore all of you. I'm starting a movement in church for the teenagers. I mean I'm all about perfection and avoiding mistakes and I won't want to see these teens and kids go through what I went through as a teenager. Mehn boys have lied to me o.......Like seriously..I have been lied to and I have been deceived but I survived... 

I hear lots of people say I'm hard core but mehn my heart has been toyed with so many times ehn....I dunno how Le boo made it sef...still trying to understand....(his jazzman is very potent).  I have heard some lies that made my head spin 360 degrees and I was like WHAT!!!....YOU DIDNT JUST LIE TO MY FACE LIKE THAT...I MUST LOOK REALLY DUMB AFTERALL. So I thought of some of the lies I've heard and this idea just came to my head and I thought to ask my closest friends here on this blog to help me. Very soon I'll start inviting some of us to help me speak to the teenagers at my church and you never know, we might just start something mind blowing. I'm all for change because the things I see around just always amazes me..... Like primary school kids having girl/boyfriends (at that age I didn't even know what boyfriend meant)....or a secondary school child "suffering" a heart break!!...like WHAT!...I just imagined me (when I was in secondary school) telling my mum I was heartbroken....infact many other things on me would have been broken by her like my leg, my arm, my head... Iya Dayo sha..hmnnn. I have this neighbour who is barely 15 and the things I hear about her, my mouth just goes..HIAN!.....  

My reaction all the time

I know some of us won't mind and the 1st person I would invite to speak with my church's teenage group would be Ugo because we talked about this before..*thumbs up*.  

So lemme share some of the lies I've heard and I would need y'all to help me. Ladies your own is cooking o. While I was typing this post, I was at a basketball court and I had lots of guys give me plenty lies...some I can't even type because of space... and then I was put on the spot. I was asked what lies we ladies tell when we don't want to have sex and I had to snitch a little. I swear I didn't tell them everything....I only told them what they already know. I promised to give a shout out to them... Sup my niggas.. thanks for the snitching. Y'all are far too kind...mwahh *this my fake bri-english will not put me in wahala some day* Hehehe. Let's do this. This is top secret so shuusshhh.....
Don't tell anyone I told you o...shuush

 1.   JUST THE TIP....

Truthfully, I have fallen for this one. I mean how stupid could I have been to fall for this lame trick. Ladies, if a guy tells you 'just the tip', tell him to keep it all to himself....both the tip and the bottom and the remaining part of it. Okunrin sha....you can lie. Ahhhhh....



2.  LETS HANG OUT IN A PRIVATE PLACE... JUST ME AND YOU... I SWEAR NOTHING WILL HAPPEN...

The 'I swear' brothers are not the nicest at all. Girls when a guy says that, look into his eyes and say 'I will pass on that offer'. It is a lie...a big fat lie. As long as no one will be there, he is going to do everything to get into your panties. He would try all the tricks in the book. First he'll say 'Baby feel comfortable...feel at home' *in Igbo accent*. Then he asks 'Can you take off your shoes'...then he would ask to cuddle you or you cuddle Him and before you know it, a sort of action called UNDRESSING would take place. God save you he doesn't rape you at the end...oya hold your ears now.... Don't go to a private place with a guy you have no plans of sleeping with. If you do, mehn sorry for you o. *covers face*... I have fallen for this particular one. SMH for me.

3.  I WANT TO MAKE LOVE TO YOU...WE ARE NOT HAVING SEX...
My face all the time I hear this one


Ladies if a guy tells you this,RUNNN....like pick up your bags and run. Or if you really like him, just close your legs tight and smile..  That guy is a pathological liar. That guy would lie and the fishes in the sea would drown. There is nothing like making love...  Sex is Sex. When a guy brings out his thing...(you know the thing na)...and he finds a way to  put it in your thing... it is SEX..as long as there is penetration, it is called SEX....The fact that he reduces the speed and tenacity, or occasionally looks into your eyes, or let's a soft music fill the background, or doesn't take you on different positions and doesn't slap or tap....all these do not change the fact that what you guys would be doing is SEX. Don't go and start blushing because he said he wants to make love to you...love making is only between a man and his wife and sometimes, even with married people, they prefer straight out, uncensored sex. A guy that says that to you wants to toy with your emotions just to get into your panties...the Emotion-Attacking liars are the baddest of the liars. They can kill you and you won't know.... I have never fallen for this one sha because I hate people that sugar coat everything. I love when a guy just comes out plain... can't deal mehn.



4.  I COULD SLEEP WITH A THOUSAND GIRLS, but I chose you so you are special. 

The set of guys that say this just want to mess with your self esteem. These kind of liars are also very bad. When a guy mentioned this yesterday, all the guy went into silent mode... I'm guessing this is the one that mustn't be said cos it works all the time. These guys would make you feel like shit just so you can be a slave to them. When a guy says that, don't smile too much o. Smile a little and say 'Go and be with those other girls....my vagina is worth more than all the thousand girls.'. Let him know you love yourself and you respect your body enough not to give it up to some guy that thinks he can come and toy with your head just to get to your cherry. No way *snaps fingers*



5.   I LOVE YOU....I don't usually say this  to any girl but I love you
You can lie...hian


Hahahaha. Do not... I repeat.... do not believe these kind of guys. It is a freaking lie. He has said that to every girl he has ever been with. Don't even think about blushing....before you'll go and blush and your heart would go and misinterpret the message.  This is what I do when someone says that to me.... I smile and I say 'wow' and I keep smiling. I almost want to laugh at this point but I keep smiling. Someone I really liked said that to me and I kinda stopped liking him. I mean I can stand stupid but I can't stand liars.  Can't deal at all mehn.

So at this juncture, I have news for everyone. Someone sent me a mail asking how boo feels about most of my posts and I remember someone asked me the same thing on this blog.  Hmnnnn..  So come Monday, Le boo would be answering plenty of your questions. I mean I can't say how he feels about so many things so I want him to answer all of your questions HIMSELF. Is there anything you want to ask him. (*whispers* Me I have one question I want to ask him).... you can send in your questions to moby.amusu@gmail.com or just leave it in the comment section down below and on Monday you would get your answers on this blog.  I can't wait already.
Moby was awarded the versatile blogger award by the delectable Tibs.... I mean how cool is that... me...Moby... Versatile blogger.  Now that's the sh*t... I was blushing like a fool when I saw the post on her blog. Thank you Tibs for the award. I guess we are doing some right afterall...hehehehe.

It's Friday again.... my weekends are usually boring except I'm working. So I would like to know what's happening this weekend. Abeg someone should invite me for owanbe na...lemme come and grace your event with my smile...*bats lashes*. 

And so I open the door to the weekend. Cheers to the freaking weekend. I love you still and you all keep me going.  Thank you so much.

 
Congratulations to all the batch 'C' corp members that passed out yesterday.... I pray the labour market shall be favour market for you in Jesus name. Amen.

Ehn ehn...am I the only one that seem to hate Lilian representing Nigeria in the big brother house?*arghhhh* I feel she is trying so hard to be like Karen Igho... bad strategy for her mehn. She asked Africa to keep her in the house so she can keep twerking for our viewing pleasure. Like seriously... that's all you have to offer. Abeg gerrowt of here. I wish there's a way people can just vote housemates out of the house, I don't like her at all. I'm sorry for diverting o... I'm sure some people don't understand what I just typed. I just had to rant for a minute there *clears throat*.

Oya I want to hear some lies o. Mannie, Duru, Chris, JJ, Praiz,  it's time to snitch on your guys. Tell us more lies guys tell and ladies, tell us the lies you've been told....and don't be shy to tell us if you fell for it or not...*wink*....I'm really eager to hear from us. Let's do this.

Cheers!

30 comments :

  1. I can't fit deal with lies. When I was in univeristy, I had sex and I had sex. When I was a corper that was the last time I had sex. I did it not cus of lies cus that's what I wanted to 2 do. I wanted to get over with it. And always in a serious relationship so its not random nacking. Can u believe that I have not had sex 4 almost 2yrs now? N I have two boy friends; one in Dubai that comes around and the other works in rig in ph. The one in ph is trying to bring up marriage discussion like "babe what r the reqirements I need for ur introduction? Do ur people accept benin people?" . N e never see my payinti. I have met guys that that wanted to sleep with me but cus seefinishism dey worry me I know their tactics and I run as fast as usain bolt (I am not kidding).
    If this ph one is serious ehen! That's when I will do testing testing.

    Ok the reason why I have option 2 is cus the one in Dubai started asking me silly questions like; "what's ur favorite sex position?, what turns u on? Snap of picture of ur boobs then pussy". So we broke up but came back again with the promise that he will never do that again. Now we r back he hasn't done anything silly. N he told me he can't date me without sex but since he has been coming to naija he hasn't innitiated it.

    Girls be wise and close ur legs. Moby also don't generalise because what works for A might not work for B. After just the tip, I want to make love to u not sex, some of this men get married to these ladies. I know ladies that had sex on the first date and now they are happily married. While holy nweje (or partial holy nweje like me) are still waiting for the ring. No man's destiny or path is the same. But for teenagers they should close their legs till they are accountable for their actions which is 20yrs for me. And always use non latex condon if conji na bastard. It should be of their will not a guy forcing them. The best thing ever is abstenance.

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    1. Miss bng I need to meet you in person. I just want to meet you and we would just gist. I can't wait for that day to come. I would definately put this down. Thank you so much. We have missed you o. Where have you been? Keep making the money for us o. I'm proud of you.

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  2. Hahahahaha!!! Moby see Wetin you take wake people up...
    Boys can lie ehhhhnnnn... that ewinor pain you is the worst...
    Congrats on your VBA!! I'm proud of ya
    Abeg incase you finally hear where it's happening, please call me o

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    1. Hahahaha.... Thank you so much Esther. Please send me your number incase I find one tomorrow. You are officially my 2nd owanbe buddy. Welcome to the club mami.

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  3. Uuurrggghh Moby nice write up. A guy once told me this "after the sex, you will meet my mother". Like seriously? Sex is the criterion to meet your mother huh? Dude I ain't that dumb nor desperate biko. Encouraging the youth at church is a good idea babe, keep us posted and pls have some fun this weekend.

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    1. Ahhhh meet his mum after sex bawo.... guys sha....if a guy opens his mouth to tell me that, I will just be laughing like an idiot. That is so lame...no way any babe will fall for that. Hahahaha

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  4. I read every line and I must say it felt like my life was being replayed. lol.
    Another lie I'd been told was "you're all I think about" Is that possible? Guys think about so many other.
    Nice one, Ugo.

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  5. Niceeeee! I liked this post a lot and it was greatbeing let in on the lies. Very funny too.. Probably one of my favourites of yours Moby.

    I am looking forward to the session with Le boo!!

    PS I think what you're doing with the teenagers in your church is such a fantastic idea. God bless you dear xx

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  6. *weeps tears away* chai all I wrote disappeared sha.
    Anyhoo one big like I can never forget is when my ex said I love you the way I love my Mom, seriously? I feel so sorry for her..if this is the kind of love you show to your mother you are not worthy to be called her son.
    That no 4, seriously? That's crap and anyone that takes that is simply stupid

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    1. Hahaha @ not worthy to be called her son!

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    2. Awwww pele dear. That thing can be frustrating ehn...pele. Hahahahaha @ I love you like my mum. Come on that is too lame...never heard that one sha.

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  7. Mhen this is so funny, chai men can lie for Africa, I once heard "u cnt b my gf n not expect us to do dat thing" after dating for just a month n some weeks o, c threat! Na only u dey dis world mbok park well... Na God save me dat day I ya carried my bag n bolted, Ladies b wise o close am tight sugar coated mouths plenty outside o....n as for those teenagers Wetin una knw sef common goan read ur book!!!. On a more serz note let's use our heads n not our hearts. Nice one hunni

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  8. Ewinor pain you? I don't think men use those lines anymore.I know we say I'll just play with the tip and not go in but we know its a lie.By the time its at the tip its the girl that would beg the man to put it in.Once she agrees with the tip then you know you will have sex.Whoever snitched on we boys must be dealt with.I hope all the ladies don't read this and believe.

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  9. Generalizing is out of content. Yes men do lie same as women. Most men see women as mere object of pleasure but women make them feel so. There are always two sides to a story, I know of a guy who will also write his own negative story about women. On the issue of SEX, I strongly uphold to sex within the marriage bond. Engaging in premarital sex show complete disregard for the santity of marriage. So if you are sticking to one guy and having sex while the other girl is doing with it several men, it is all the same. I'm glad you made some tactics wayward men try to use to seduce ladies. Bottom line as long you weren't raped, if you sleep with a guy out his deception, you are responsible for your own action.

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  10. Generalizing is out of content. Yes men do lie same as women. Most men see women as mere object of pleasure but women make them feel so. There are always two sides to a story, I know of a guy who will also write his own negative story about women. On the issue of SEX, I strongly uphold to sex within the marriage bond. Engaging in premarital sex show complete disregard for the santity of marriage. So if you are sticking to one guy and having sex while the other girl is doing with it several men, it is all the same. I'm glad you reveal some tactics wayward men try to use to seduce ladies. Bottom line as long you weren't raped, if you sleep with a guy out his deception, you are responsible for your own action.
    Nice write up

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  11. Noooo this is too funny.Everything you said here is true but don't forget to tell them abstinence is the best.You are just a kolo babe and I have one question for le boo.How does he cope with you?I want to know

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  12. I have been laughing for like 2hors now. Moby you are a case. I know its me you we're talking about in the post tho. Anyway my question for leboo .sir, are you confident Moby isn't and wouldn't cheat on you? If yes why and how confident are you lol

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  13. Hmmm moby 9ce topic as usual,let me tell u d moda of all lies.It was actually told by my brother 2 hs wife. According 2 wat she told me,her hubby woke up one morn arnd 5.30am n started textin one girl dt he wud lik 2 spend d day with her,she accsted d text n my bro started beggin dt he was just jokin arnd bla bla bla. Fast4ward 2 a week l8r,I'd gone 2 visit SIL in her shop n then she gt called 4 a deal she'd been pursuin n she had 2 b dere immediately bt she needed 2 get home 1st so I decided 2 go with her. As we were approaching dere house,I noticed she kept staring at some1,when we gOt home she decided 2 park outside since we won't b long,moby,do u knw it was d girl they had a fight abt d previous week dt my SIS was starin at?u need 2 see d shock on my bro's face when we entered,ds is some1 who left home b4 his wife earlier dt day o nt knwin he was planning a rendevous with som1 in his house,d girl nw knockd d gate,na me open sef n I dealt with her,till 2day her bag is still in d house,do u knw what bros said?he said he noticed hs wife had been actin cold since d text incident so he decided 2 invite d girl ova so dt she wud come n xplain dt dere's notin btwn them,imagine! If u see d look I gave him ehn,himself no say he nor try atall dt day
    So u see,men can lie o

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    1. Hahahaha. .. this is too funny. Mehnnnnnn you can never catch a man red handed..there would always be a lie to cover up a lie. Hmnn

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    2. Hahahaha. .. this is too funny. Mehnnnnnn you can never catch a man red handed..there would always be a lie to cover up a lie. Hmnn

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  14. I didn't know about that 'i love you' line until after i had broken up with three of my exes and i found they all had girlfriends while dating me. I was the naive one who felt when a guy said those words he actually meant it. Men sha!

    http://journalofapetitediva.blogspot.com

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    1. Awww. I've always known you are a good girl..... I'm so sure you are smarter now... mwaaahhhh

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  15. Hiya mami.....Erhmmm...**covers face** I am last on this one tho'....anyhoo....I have been trying to reach you since last night....please call me when you can eh.....

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  16. After 10 years relationship with my boyfriend, he changed suddenly and stopped contacting me regularly, he would come up with excuses of not seeing me all the time. He stopped answering my calls and my sms and he stopped seeing me regularly. I then started catching him with different girls friends several times but every time he would say that he love me and that he needed some time to think about our relationship. But after l contacted Dr. Ikhine of spell cast temple he cast a love spell and after a day, my boyfriend started contacting me regularly and we moved in together after a few months and he was more open to me than before and he started spending more time with me than his friends. We eventually got married and we now have been married happily for 3 years with a son. Ever since Dr. Ikhine of agbadado@gmail.com or call him +2347060552255 helped me, my partner is very stable, faithful and closer to me than before

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    1. This is a joke right? People still do love spells in this age... no way. Hahaha

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  17. Hey, hi.I always read yur posts but I don't ever comment. But today I'll have to ask mr boo a question.Do you really love Moby? And what are your plans for her? And how do you show her you love her? Well 3 questions aint bad either. I love your write ups Miss Mobs.

    Kemi

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  18. (NB:Okay....so I have been trying to post since Friday.....and my wonderful phone+network+the browser....all join....no just allow me).
    I am very vexed with you Moby....see me claiming 'Padi' and 'big sis of life' to Tito.....(I even call you "inspirational"...kai)....and you forgot my birthday. Was hoping to get a big shout out.....anyways shaaa....
    My question.....Mr Tito.....*clears throat*....*sucks agbalumo*....*drink gin and washes mouth*....hehe....."when will arsenal win any trophy....particularly...EPL?!!"....hehehe.
    #ManchesterUnitedForEver....ℓ☺ℓ​.

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  19. hahahahaha Chisoss... Moby e haf lick all the secret in the bookk and finish.. At all those guys that leaked the secret, god will judge you.. hehehehehehe I wish i could comment but.. heheheheh Moby you are EPIC aswear. goddamnit. :)

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  20. Its official mehn! Moby is a comedienne. I couldn't stop LMAO. But most of em' are real facts tho. I'm quite a blunt nigga, but I used one of the lines back in school on a lady who was tryna form too much :p.




    #Nicepost

























































































    #Mαηηiε



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  21. Moby :') ) I don die. The pictures are something else in addition to the funny writeup.
    "It's cos I'm so attracted to you, I don't get this way with any other girl I swear... it even disgusts me if another girl comes close to me" said the ex in response to why he kept disturbing my life for what I wasn't ready for. Same trifling nigga after all that jazz cheated and tried to lie his way out. I managed to stay friends with him after the breakup and he went after my friend secretly, all the while trying to get me back. Smh.
    Girl, na die we dey with some of these guys. Tueh!

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