Monday, 4 May 2015

D FOR DEAL BREAKER


I just saw a deal breaker...nooooo *my face all the time*
Strolls in......grabs the Mic*


*clears throat*



*Pops collar*



*Bad ass gangster mode activated*

*singing*

#Ladder ladder ladder ladder ooooooo#


#Our Lord Jesus is a ladder#



#Oya follow the ladder....follow the ladder....to heaven#


LMAO......do you all remember that song?


I once put up the video....


*Anywayssss*

Hellurrrrrrrrr...

While I was away, I had the opportunity of making loads of friends. The amount of friends I've made in 1 month is quite unimaginable for me sha...judging by how anti-social I can be at times. I'm actually kinda proud of myself *someone should rub my head na*. 

I made only 5 new friends oooo (before you think I have 1 million friends).... To all my new friends, Tunde, Onyeabo, Kay, Dami, Tijani, sup to all of you...(*high five*).... If I didn't give you all a shout out, I'm sure I won't hear the last of it most especially from Dami *covers face *.

So sometime last week, I spoke to a few friends about the "Deal breaker".. Please dont ask me what and how in God's name I got to  think in that direction..(*adunno oo*)... Well it was when I saw the mad man with the 'bushy' thing *covers face *. 

One of my colleague read that post and said 'Bolaji you saw a mad man and the only thing you noticed was his bushy south pole?'..*covers face again*.

I mean come onnnnn.... the hair was that long and full and in everyones face.....I saw it cos it was there. Hehehee. My friend Onyeabo called me and said 'I hope your mum doesn't read your blog...cos you haff baje finish'...hehehee..... I'm sure the 1st timers here do not know what I'm talking about... check the post here... 

So..The "Deal breaker"...for me, it has to be...wait for it.... Bushy privates!!!!.... I dont like it for anything. It smells when its all bushy cos of sweat...  Nooooo way mhen!!!!*shivers*.
Ama throw the love in the trash can immediately

Ok Let me explain the "Deal breaker"....  According to urban dictionary, deal breaker is 'the catch' that a particular individual cannot overlook and ultimately outweighs any redeeming quality the individual may possess...emphasis on OUTWEIGHS... The deal breaker is something or anything someone does (a habit, a way of living, a belief, line of thought....anything associated with the person) and you know in your christian mind, you are never ever going to call that person again. It is what puts you off completely....some would call it a "No No". If you've ever seen 'Baggages' hosted by Jerry Springer, you'll get the gist.

So I spoke to my guys about theirs... and here's what I got...(A few)...if you can totally relate, let me know. Ladies and gents learn from this..

Kay: I was hanging out with this girl whose bedroom was just a train wreck. I’ve let my room get a bit messy at times, though I tidy up if I expect company, but this was just bad. Used plates still in the room for what seemed like for ever!. Sheets not washed for ....Only her knows how long cos it was smelling and piled up in a corner... Dirty underwear all over the place....?

All this i ignored until she jumped on her bed, spread her legs and through the tear in her jeans I could see the little red thong she was wearing. One kinda smell oozed from somewhere and I was hoping it wasn't from her vagina...but it was from there..damn!.. She was actually pretty damn good looking for who she really was but I was thinking about going for it, except there was no bed sheet on her heavily stained mattress and I noticed it was stained with all sorts....mention it... saliva from regular drooling, blood, food stain already turned black.. ewhhhh *vomits*.... I think that might have been the only time I’ve ever Nope'd my way out of a girl’s bedroom.

DAMI: Guys or girls, if your kitchen has stacks of dirty dishes, and the counters are covered in the remnants of week old cooking experiments, it’s a huge turn off. Any mess in general is bad, but food mess is the worst. There was this guy I was interested in. He loved to cook but he didn't know how to clean up after himself. Once I was trying to be a good friend and tried to clean up his mess. I opened one pot and lo and behold there were maggots in it. No way am I ever letting him cook for me ever.

MOBY: *my deal breaker*....Poop in the toilet..I’ll ignore it, but your opinion will forever be sullied by the fact that you didn’t flush and I can tell the kinda waste that comes out of your ass...hehehee....

There are more deal breakers ooo.....But I really don't want to bore you all with a long list...so I have asked them to post their breakers as comments and I'm asking you too...

I'm sure y'all have deal breakerssss....


And I wanna know...


There's no weekend download today....reason being I decided to stay home this weekend.


I saw Fast and Furious 7 on Saturday.... I did not cry at the end *ntoiiii..(Tongue out)  at Kike and Lola*.....


Who has seen it and don't lie...did you cry?


Gist me how  your weekend was mobylizers...



 To everyone reporting to orientation camp tomorrow, good luck o....and make sure you enjoy camp. I did a post sometime ago about how you can survive in camp. You can read it here and thank me later *winks*.


Have a super Monday...


Cheers!!


17 comments :

  1. The only deal breaker for me is dirt, it's not like i'm an ambassador for omo fast action but how can it be so hard to keep urself clean? There are no two ways to it o, you reek, I move!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am a clean woman mi crush of life *bats lashes*...hehe.

      Delete
  2. Hahahahaha...moby got me lauging out loud alone
    Deal breaker for me is being dirty,yes my room could be a mess with clothes up nd down but it must not be dirty
    I really hate dirt nd bad breath
    Jibbyks.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Same here...but people always say women are naturally dirty spp. How annoying s that...well I have my very clean moments and i have my clean moment...everyone does

      Delete
  3. Hahahahaha...moby got me lauging out loud alone
    Deal breaker for me is being dirty,yes my room could be a mess with clothes up nd down but it must not be dirty
    I really hate dirt nd bad breath
    Jibbyks.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  4. Bolaji haf spoil n finish.d deal breaker for me is bushy mustache. I dont like it . imagine kissing a man wt bie bie, it will just be chooking you anyhow. No o

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bukky is razz kai.... bushy mustache aint so bad o...for me sha... but how can you not like a man with beards? You weird mi love

      Delete
  5. Yuck @ kay's dealbreaker. Women are dirty sha #doing the running man

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  6. my deal breaker has to be a guy that still keeps pictures of his exes on his phone.i am too jealous o. Tola

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hmmm...deal breaker...I think for me a deal breaker would be dirtiness. Yeah that should be it, i'm not fully sure yet cos i don't think i've come across that thing that really grosses me out. So for now ill say dirt.

    www.askralphblog.com ... we serve beer...lol

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  8. Bragging,showing off and being Boss I cnt stand that shit

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  9. Okkkkaaaaayyy.. So this is interesting oh! Meeehhnnn whoever the lady described by ehhmmm **Scratches head.. **Scrolls up... ehen described by by Kay is ehn.. My Dear The lorddd is your deliverer... Ossssshheeey Turn uP! So you saw Fast an Furious 7 ba?! Now tell me that movie wasnt coollll **Shines teeth.. That movie is the shizzle ma Niggle.. hehehehe It was frosh like that.. Mehnnnn in that scene they fell from the plane with their cars ehn.. I was like Daayyyyuumm.. it was awesome... And #PaulWalker was just a Slayer aswear.. He finished work for that film... RIP ma Brover... Me i did not cry oh... However "Long day" his tribute song and official sound track has been my Ringtone for a bit now **covers face

    Okay so Deal Breakers yeah?! It has to be money Related.. I mean no lady has been funny enough to show me her not so clean side... But my number 1 turn off is JdB gimme 7k! heheheheh that was the last one i had.. So no Fex... I actually screenshot the text, and i havebeen laughung ever since... i mean i am a Broke ass nah.. So why ask for money.. Any lady that does that one ehn.. Na Case closed kinda file be that..

    Nice one Baby mi, this was a very ghen ghen read... and the crowd goes **Singing and Bumping head.. Turn down for what?! Turn Down for what?!

    P.S: Moby aswear this your mind ehyn.. It must be a bladdy freak show inside there.. aha!! Kilode?! The kinda things you think ehn! Chisos! A neFer HexspeRRit.. **Shines teeth Dear Lawwwddd....

    ReplyDelete
  10. When I saw the title d for deal breaker, I just sais this girl has come again. I jusr love your style of writing. Its unique. Everytime I'm home and I'm reading your blog, my hubby is always wondering who's making his wife laugh you are just funny.

    My own deal breaker is men that talk too much. Can you just shut up for 1 minute and enjoy the day. Like tyrese in fast and furious 7.lol

    Who is this duru guy. He must be Moby's bf or best friend cos his comments are always funny long and fantastic like a new blog post.lol

    I love you all. Not a regular commenter

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  11. My deal breaker is a snorer. You snore and I'm out of your life forever because I am a light sleeper

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  12. I guess selfishness ,lousiness and lying are my deal breakers.

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  13. Duru what is it? Me that has not watched it nko... just come and be sharing spoilers Anyhow.
    Deal breakers....Moby i've many they would make up a new post *writes down post idea in my journal*
    Hair on the back, smoking and always getting drunk, bad breadth, loud mouth....
    Divadiari.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete

Your comments are like jollof rice to my stomach... the more you leave a comment, the happier I get. Thanks for stopping by...I love you like kilode *mwwaahhh*