Friday, 7 August 2015

WOMAN CHILL PLEASE

Hello guys.... 
What's popping... 
Ki lo n sele... *razz mode activated*..hahaha

Thank you all so much for wishing my mum a happy birthday... Y'all are da bombest... Thanks *mwahhhhh*

I want to give a huge shout out to all the August babies in da house... whoop whoop!!!


We rock all the way.
Also, happy birthday to Mr. Ife- Adeniyi, Temidire and every August 7th babies. God's goodness and mercy will be with you all the days of your life. Amen.
To today's tori, I got a mail from someone I assume would be a guy and then GBAM... this hate mail from this nigga.
 *pause* Hol up...hol uppp... I call it a hate mail cos this bros was obviously hating on we female folks.... I mean what must we have done to this oga to deserve this much hate... not cool. Well I read through and I can ca-te-go-ri-cal-ly tell you that I am guilty of some of these things *covers face*. 

So here we go

Ladies I am tired of my girlfriend and her unnecessary wahalas. WATAPIN. I love my babe o. I think I love her too much sef but she is so annoying. I spoke to a few of my guys and they said their women do it too. Do you guys have monthly meeting where you all agree to do same thing? ehn? Well, below are a few of the things I face as a boyfriend to a woman. E don taya me jor. Ladies I am not hating. I just need you to be considerate at times. We are humans after all. 

1. Ladies, why do you always take your dreams seriously. WHYYYYY?????? It is only but a dream. My girlfriend saw me making out with a friend of hers and till tomorrow, I wouldn't stop hearing about how I cheated on her with her friend. Stop getting mad at me for what I did in your dreams. Please.

2. Ladies are the worst decision makers ever. Why can't you just make up your mind on time. You need to see my babe's shoe closet and she would always complain of not having shoe. I have just 5 pairs of shoe and I am very humble with it. 2 black shoes, 1 brown, 1 all stars and one i use to play ball. O tan (finish) and I am proud to say I have enough shoes. Not my babe. Or in other instances

Me: “What do you want to do for dinner?” Her: “I don’t know, whatever’s fine with me.” Me: “How about KFC rice and chicken?” Her: “I’m not in the mood for chicken.” Me: “What are you in the mood for?” Her: “Eh, whatever you want…”. My bad but when you guys say “whatever”, I assume you mean “whatever.”. Then garri and groundnut is good nigbayen.

3. Taking from their man’s plate of food. This is the worst. O dun mi (it pains me). I hope bae doesn't see this post or else I am dead. The annoying is she doesn't even ask. She just takes and I'm like

Order your own f@%king fries or salad at the restaurant. I told you to get whatever you wanted. I wanted a whole serving of fries, that’s why I ordered myself a whole serving of fries. I didn’t order something cause I only wanted half of it and was hoping to split the rest with you. The annoying thing is she'll still not finish hers after stealing from me.

4. Painting their eyebrows like the great wall of China. Ladies trust me no man loves too see that brow after you have entered the sun and it has melted the whole thing and half of it is off.  Stop making your eyebrows like the Nike symbol. We no like am at all. Every woman is now a makeup artist.





5. Not knowing how to take compliments. When we say, “you look beautiful today” we aren’t saying you don’t look beautiful on any other day, we are just saying you look exceptionally beautiful today. Take it as a goddamn compliment.

I really do not want to bore you but there is a very long list of things you women do that are pretty annoying. I hope you enjoyed this read. Thanks Moby for this opportunity given to me. Now I feel like a celebrity blogger. Thanks. Hello Mobylizers. Peace out.

MOBY SPEAKS
*hahahahahahaha*

Okay I am guilty of all the above. Small gist. When Leboo and I just started dating, I had a dream I saw him with his ex... they were not doing anything o but you know the way dreams are like na.. you can tell the end most times. I woke Leboo up and started crying cats and dog. I didn't know why I was crying but I think it was the tears I wanted to shed in the dream... The poor boy started begging for sins he didn't commit. Men have suffered. Anyways, thanks dear for this lovely post. God bless you.

And with all this English I have spoken, I open the door to an amazing weekend. 
Have a beautiful weekend and make sure your weekend download is better than mine *winks*.

Cheers......

18 comments :

  1. Loooooollll!!!

    I am guilty of 1, 2 and 3....Okay, who am I kidding, when I have bad brows day, I'm guilty of 4.
    This was really funny. Thanks for sharing.

    www.tomilolaescada.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. What a delightful read, a good one to start the weekend with. Greetings to you and nice weekend!

    ReplyDelete
  3. This was a good read.very funny. Tola

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hahaha
    Aren't we all guilty of at least two as girls
    This things make us who we are if you ask me
    Lol

    ReplyDelete
  5. Uncle u sef take a chillllll pill... Two years back i dreamt that I and d leboo then were going out and at a point, he left me when he saw another lady, I called him back many times and he no gree ansa.. Months later dude e-mailed me his wedding invitation... On making decisions, u know we're ladies naw, guess that's how we'r modeled.... Upon all sef, u guyz can't do without us and am sure u'r really enjoying those nautie act of hers... Talk true..

    Moby, let's have a makeup class plss... Even if its for few weekends, make we for no dey draw nike eyebrows again (Am partly-guilty of that)... Better still, can we have a 'Moby Impressionz' class? I would be so glad to be your student.... Just let us know how it would go - the timing, amount involved, practicals involved and all... Don't say no!! Thanks hun...

    Regards to Tito to jaye ju... We'v missed him on the blog o.. He jus go silent mode all this while, wharis hapuning?

    Love u loads Moby.. U rock..

    ReplyDelete
  6. This is so funny and so true... My boyfriend is not allowed to smile in his sleep, it's cheating.
    pheezy's corner

    ReplyDelete
  7. hahahah...this article got me in stiches... if i hear say boys don't care abt nike eyebrows !!!!




    MY KIDS WILL DO DIFFERENTLY

    ReplyDelete
  8. Hehehehehe..most ladies are so guilty of these..so he should calm down its all love

    www.glowyshoe.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  9. Haha Omg, this guy should chill oh. No 2 is my forte. I can be so indecisive. I want anything. It all depends on you is my usual response. But I've never dreamt bout leboo cheating before so no experience on that. I'm too busy dreaming bout meat and clothes.
    This writer is good oh, he should come and write a guest post for me oh

    Divadiari.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  10. I am guilty of no 3,but my hubby no nice. He won't share but i force my way while no2 us vice versa.
    Happy weekend

    ReplyDelete
  11. Ladies take note....
    Mami sorry my birthday wish for your mum is coming late..mbuk no vex...
    Happy birthday to her and llnp.
    Lovely weekend to you and all mobylizers

    ReplyDelete
  12. Lmaooo...i feel the guys pain. Believe me its sicking watching some girls act the way they do mehn. sometimes it just make someone never want to date. but thank God for understanding and maturity. At least we are not so perfect ourselves. but girls these days though.

    ReplyDelete
  13. loooool this was funny. Loved it
    www.djournae.com

    ReplyDelete
  14. All he ladies I know do the picking from plate thing. I hate it. It is annoying

    ReplyDelete

Your comments are like jollof rice to my stomach... the more you leave a comment, the happier I get. Thanks for stopping by...I love you like kilode *mwwaahhh*